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I spent New Year’s Eve at Fossil Rim, my favorite place on the planet.  As midnight approached, I realized that I had no New Year’s Eve Resolution.  I am more content than I have ever been.  I need nothing. (I only wish the sciatica and osteoarthritis in my hips would get better.)  I gave myself a week to come up with a good resolution.

Yesterday, as I caught up on a week’s worth of newspapers, I found an article in The Wall Street Journal that inspired my resolution for 2011.  The article is titled, “Making 2011 the Year of Great Relationships”.  Elizabeth Bernstein makes some great points:

• Social bonds effect everything from how our brains process information to how our bodies respond to stress.
• People with strong personal connections may live longer.
• The quality of our relationships is the single biggest predictor of our happiness.

I can’t stand blogs that simply reprint articles, so I won’t.  Go read it for yourself online.  She gives some good advice.

I resolve to make building relationships a priority for 2011.  This is a tougher resolution than you might think.  I am an off-the-charts introvert.  Always have been.  During recess in elementary school, I would go sit in a tree during recess.  I was invited to a grand total of one sleepover the entire time I was growing up.  I had two dates before I went to college.  I endure loud, large parties and leave quietly when I have had enough.  On the other hand, I can carry on long intense conversations with one to six friends for hours.

During and after college I found friends and lovers.  There were patches of deep loneliness, but as I got older I found great enjoyment in my own thoughts and creativity.  At the age of 57 my idea of bliss is to be quiet, read books, sleep, kiss my husband, pet the dog and cat, and start a new project.

I have lived in Dallas for six years, but have yet to build the kind of girl friendship I had in New York.  I miss girlfriends.  It is up to me to find my own friends if I think they are so important.  I don’t think they will just knock on the door and find me.

New Year’s Resolutions do work.  At the end of yoga class yesterday I started chatting with the woman next to me.  We decided that next week we will go hike the Katy Trail or have lunch after class.  She seemed as surprised and delighted to meet me as I was to meet her.  It was really easy.

I continue to be struck by the blessing of living longer that allows us to fill in the blanks for things we missed in earlier years.

What better ideas do you have for building relationships in 2011? It is good for you–really!

Copyright TheNewElder 2012