Image by hansberickson via Flickr

The Gum Job: Oral Sex for Seniors

Image by hansberickson via Flickr

Lunch with the Guys

But when she asked me if I wanted her to leave her teeth in or take them out…that was about the last thing I was expecting to hear right then”, Hubert (not his real name) told us over lunch.  “But when she added that she was sure I would enjoy it if she did, my next thought was ‘tres kinky’, and she was sure right.  Yowsir!”

Co-worker Hubert was regaling us with his latest adventures of being on the road for overnight business.  He was single and the rest of us were married.  None of us encouraged his exploits but we sure had a lot of laughs hearing them.  Poor bastard; he had none of the joys us married guys had so he entertained himself with shallow, temporary relationships like this one with the toothless vixen.

Senior Oral Sex

What Hubert was describing to his lunchtime pals in hushed tones was him experiencing what he called his first “gum job”- senior oral sex.  He had met an attractive woman many years older than him who was also traveling alone on business.  One thing lead to another,… blah, blah, blah…, and the next thing you knew, she had her teeth out and placed on the bedside table beside the wine glasses and cigarettes.  From that point on, Hubert became an aficionado of sex with seniors and swore to the rest of us that “senior sex”, and particularly senior oral sex with women who wore dentures – “gum jobs” — was the only way to fly.

The Joy of Dentures (or Gums)

With an estimated 30 million denture wearers in the United States, and with 10,000 Baby Boomers turning 65 every day, there is already a lot of toothless love-making going on today.

Perhaps no one describes it better than R&B great Margie Day did in her hit 1953 recording, “Take our your false teeth Daddy, Momma wants to scratch your gums”.

EDITORS NOTE: I wasn’t sure whether to publish this in the “Jobs” or in the “Quality of Life” category.


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